People with high scores for the Detacher type are usually good at stepping back, observing, and gaining perspective on people and situations. In fact, they are generally more comfortable keeping a distance than jumping into the fray. They often fit the profile of an introvert, that is, someone who feels at home in solitude. Although Detachers may enjoy being with other people, they typically need a lot of down time, both to recharge their batteries as well as to access and process their feelings. Yet even then, they seem to filter their emotions through their intellect rather than to experience them viscerally, as energy in their bodies. In any event, Detachers generally steer clear of emotional intensity, preferring the world of the mind.
People whose primary type is the Detacher seem to carry a wound that says, in effect, “deep down, you are a bad. There is something wrong with you.” The fear that this wounded belief may actually be true is often a key driver in the Detacher’s psyche, personality, and behavior. Maintaining a stance of detachment, for example, represents a safe way to avoid exposing whatever is inside that may be bad. The highly active mental life that characterizes Detachers may also stem from this same fear, for they are better able to keep any badness under control through the mind, rather than risk something untoward popping out through the more spontaneous expression of emotions.
For people whose primary type is the Detacher, the lover archetype is their kryptonite and therefore likely to be in shadow. Thus, the final step on the pathway for these people is likely to be into their lover. To take this step, they usually need to understand that rather than just being in their head, which is a criticism they have probably heard throughout their lives, they are actually very emotional people who happen to be especially familiar with the feeling of fear.
Note: If you are wondering how high, or how low, you might be in Detaching, then do our Survey, and talk with one of our certified Practitioners. If you want a more in-depth understanding of the Detacher (and the 11 other Shadow Types), then please attend one of our Trainings.